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Published 25.09.2013 | Author : admin | Category : Women Need Men

According to The Huffington Post, there are over three million users on Seeking Arrangement, with nearly eight women for every man, and to tackle their debt, some sugar babies (typically younger, debt-ridden students or recent graduates), have taken on more than one sugar daddy, while asking for $1,000-$3,000 per month from each. In many instances, sex is involved, and as that is the case, some feel Seeking Arrangement is essentially a prostitution or escort service. A student at New York University, the college with the highest number of sugar babies, shared what it’s like to live as one with NYU Local, a campus news blog, and some of what she said felt like it could’ve been pulled out of a 50 Shades of Grey-inspired novel. When asked why she didn’t just waitress, the NYU sugar baby told NYU Local that she could easily make $2,000 to $5,000 by meeting with a sugar daddy four times a month. As for the guys she met, they varied and came from all walks of life. A 33-year-old IT manager she met on the site left quite a different impression as he started licking the inner contours of her ear during the second date. Sex was always the elephant in the room, Hill noted, and she felt it was hard to find anyone not interested in it, except for the Ralph Waldo Emerson fan mentioned above.
Hill understood why some people consider the site as prostitution and was conflicted about being a sugar baby altogether.
Much like many of the other sugar babies who have shared their stories, she was also a broke college student trying to make ends meet and decided to join the site after feeling concerned about debt. Through emails the two decided on an “allowance” of $450 and the daddy-stepdaughter fantasy he wanted played out; however, the sex seemed cold and calculated. Much like Hill, this sugar baby felt quite conflicted about her “job.” “I’m constantly torn about how I feel about what I do,” she said.
Seeking Arrangement seems oblivious to the psychological and emotional harm they could cause by providing a platform for sugar baby relationships, and the company sees little, if anything, wrong with the practice.
NEW YORK -- Three years ago, during his junior year at New York University, Kirk met with a financial aid officer to plead a familiar case: his inability to manage the yearly payments on his $50,000 tuition bill. Once again, the school official reminded Kirk that in order to register for next semester’s courses, he needed to come up with another $8,000 -- or risk expulsion.
Kirk nearly divulged his secret to the loan officer, finally letting her know exactly what he had resorted to in a desperate attempt to finance his education. But the willingness to date for money is not limited to beleaguered young women struggling to pay off debt.
The rise in the number of straight and gay college students moonlighting as "sugar babies" occurs at a time when the life plans of many 20-somethings have taken a brutal detour.
In addition to a lackluster job market, a historic number of recent graduates are also struggling to pay off an overwhelming amount of student loan debt. While many 20-somethings embarked on their dream of a college education when a decent-paying job was virtually guaranteed as part of the package, the rules have now changed -- and a new generation is coming of age during an era of limited options. Kirk tries to abide by a few basic ground rules when getting sex for money: he refuses to perform oral sex, always wears protection, and will only have sex as a top, never a bottom. For the time being, Kirk says he sees working as a part-time prostitute as a practical solution to climbing out from beneath a mountain of student debt. But with tuition money due each month, and an endless stream of voice mails from student loan creditors, sex work is starting to feel like something Kirk can’t afford not to do. Seeking Arrangement regularly sponsors parties for sugar babies and sugar daddies to come out from behind their laptops and reveal themselves in open-air mixers.
At first glance, the crowd resembles one that could be found in any standard Midtown nightclub.
But the average age of most of the men is 50 -- or older -- and they are gray-haired and balding. Stephan Smith, who helps run Seeking Arrangement, says a majority of the “higher caliber” people in terms of both looks and wealth haven’t come out tonight. Career counselors and those offering discounted plastic surgery lurk at the edge of the nightclub. While the party skews toward straight men and women, a few young gay men are also on the prowl. While there are more than 80,000 gay sugar babies on Sugar Daddy For Me, there are only about 11,000 gay sugar daddies on the site.
Another of the party's attendees, Samuel Schall, studied the gay sugar baby culture as an undergraduate at George Washington University.
Schall mentions the tendency of older, straight men to pursue relationships with younger, gay men. Wade concedes that men who are married and identify as straight are drawn to his site partly because of the level of anonymity it provides. Noel Biderman, the 39-year-old founder and CEO of Avid Life Media, a social entertainment company, runs a handful of arrangement-seeking websites. Based on a written survey of 100 sugar babies in New York, Schall concluded that in both good times and bad, sugar babies seek out the companionship of sugar daddies -- gay or straight -- because they want to be able to afford a certain lifestyle. Jake says he didn’t really need the money his sugar daddy paid him, but his tastes quickly adjusted to accommodate his new lifestyle.
Over the course of two years, they met up once or twice each month to spend long, luxurious weekends at fancy hotels in major cities. Eventually, though, the relationship started to feel like nothing more than a transaction, with Jake seeing only dollar signs whenever the two spent time together. Jake says explaining his extravagant purchases to his parents, who often wonder where the money comes from, has created an unforeseen challenge.


While his parents paid for college, Jake has considered selling sex again in order to pay for graduate school.
Unlike in the straight world, many say they find working as an escort on the gay scene to be an accepted, even applauded practice. Christian Grov, an assistant professor of public health at Brooklyn College and co-author of “In the Company of Men: Inside the Lives of Male Prostitutes," attributes the rise of young gay men engaged in sex work as part of a growing sense of social acceptance.
In his research, which included an Internet-based sample of gay sex workers in New York City, Grov found that a significant number of gay male escorts were looking to put themselves through school. While Jake reports having earned vast sums of money from his sugar daddy, Grov says the going rate for men tends to be far less than for women. Grov says he sees debt-strapped young men as particularly vulnerable and likely to consider sex work, especially when they can’t find jobs out of school that pay a living wage. This past summer, Alex, an 18-year-old freshman at the University of California, Riverside, started looking for a sugar daddy to help pay for school. Alex, who is not openly gay, has kept his behavior secret from both friends and family, fearing their reaction.
Bimbi says young men look for sugar daddies as a way to avoid the stigma that would come with becoming full-time sex workers. I’m here to tell you after having a Sugar Daddy provide me with over $100,000.00, coaching Sugar Babies 1-on-1, helping thousands of Sugar Babies get the results they want that there is always a SMART way and a HARD way to achieve Sugar Baby success. Imagine having someone invest in you to start the business you always dreamed, and guiding you on the path to success from their experience. Imagine being surrounded by influential, dynamic men who can help guide you in your career and provide you access to their network to help you succeed. This is the place where you find your cure to asking for what you want and actually getting it. If something’s not working for you, maybe it’s because you haven’t figured out how to do it right. Discover how to effectively navigate this lifestyle based on your wants to propel your lifestyle forward with less effort and time with my Sugar Daddy Blueprint. Here is a question I bet you want to know the answer to: “How can you Find a Sugar Daddy And Ask for What you Want and Get it?” The TRUTH is, as soon as you stop hopping from site to site, and make the commitment to mastering the Sugar Daddy game. We send out Sugar Baby Tips to help you take control of your Sugar Baby Lifestyle and be more successful with Sugar Daddies…weekly…via email. In that way, she's an inspiration to me She's got a quirky sense of humor, but she's fun to be around," Sides says.
The views expressed in the contents above are those of our users and do not necessarily reflect the views of MailOnline. The sugar baby went by the fictitious name of Natalie Hill for the piece, and her story started like the stories of many, many, many, many, many, many other sugar babies.
And I don’t mean that in a metaphorical way in that I model, strip or work for one of those phone sex lines.
The site likens sugar babies to concubines, courtesans and geishas of the past, and they also think the relationships they’re peddling, which they refer to as “arrangements” or “mutually beneficial relationships,” are normal. He has continued selling his wares on what he describes as “virtual street corners" -- websites where young gay men seek out the companionship of wealthy older suitors. Kirk’s lithe, bare physique figures prominently in most of his profile photos, while others showcase his dark, chiseled features. Late last month, The Huffington Post chronicled the uptick of debt-strapped young women similarly searching online for suitors or wealthy benefactors who, in exchange for companionship, sex, or both, might help with the bills. An increasing number of gay male students have also taken to the web in the past several years searching for wealthy benefactors. Further, between the first quarter of 1999 and the first quarter of 2011, student loan debt increased by a whopping 511 percent, with borrowers under the age of 30 bearing the biggest financial brunt.
Of Sugar Daddy For Me’s 3 million members, Sharma says that about 2 million are sugar babies. In 2007, the site said it had 5,239 gay male sugar babies who were also enrolled in college. Whenever possible, he tries to avoid having sex with supposedly straight, married men looking for a “discreet” hook-up. I want to feel equal and empowered, but I’m also really explicit that I’m just there for the money,” says Kirk, who estimates that he’s received money for having sex with more than 100 men in the last few years. One sugar daddy paid for two years’ worth of rent on an apartment in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, while another cosigned an additional loan for school. Kirk also works as a server at a Manhattan restaurant four nights a week and auditions for theater and film work during the day. Seeking Arrangement, which Wade says has about 100,000 members in the New York City area alone, received about 400 RSVPs for its latest fete, a mid-August party called "Midsummer Night Affair." The party’s promoter, Alan “Action” Schneider, says that more than 500 have shown up -- with men paying an entrance fee of $80 and women forking over $40. Sharma, Wade’s competitor and the founder of Sugar Daddy For Me and Gay Sugar Daddy Finder, is standing nearby. Schall hopes to help organize a separate event specifically targeting gay men later this fall.
The biggest high generally came after he spent time with his sugar daddy, when he’d walk home with bags full of newly-purchased designer clothes and expensive shoes.


Sex was often involved, but it was not uncommon for the two to meet up for quiet, midweek dinners on Capitol Hill.
Growing less enamored of his sugar daddy (the two no longer speak) and with graduation looming, Jake started budgeting his money. Recently, when an expensive pair of sunglasses yielded particular suspicion, Jake brushed off their accusations, saying that a close friend had loaned them to him. While none of the nearly dozen men interviewed had told their parents about their sugar daddies, nearly all had discussed them with their friends.
Gay men engaged in sex work often face far less of a stigma than do straight women, he says. Most saw it as a temporary means to an end, rather than work they considered pursuing for the long haul.
Bimbi, an assistant professor of health sciences at LaGuardia Community College, conducted a study of 50 gay men between the ages of 18 and 50 who participated in Internet-based sex work. He has already amassed $16,000 in student debt, and still has one more year of school, and $7,000 in tuition, to go.
Jones and I am the founder of The Sugar Daddy Formula and host of the SugaInsider Sweet Talk Podcast. Or wanting to enhance your life through your relationships to ease you on your journey in life. When things got particularly bad, Hill decided to join, and soon enough she was receiving messages. While young gay men exchanging sex for money certainly predated the financial collapse, recent events have pushed some students to consider engaging in risky behavior that in more robust economic times might have been unthinkable, according to several owners of websites that broker such hook-ups. Bureau of Labor Statistics reported that half of recent graduates are underutilized -- whether they are jobless, working part time, or working in a job that doesn’t require a college degree and therefore tends to pay less.
Census Bureau recently reported that over the past 20 years, the average annual cost of college has more than doubled. Men seeking a gay sugar daddy account for about 80,000 of the site’s members and of these, about a quarter list some combination of “school,” “college,” “university,” “money for school,” “student debt,” “college debt,” “tuition,” and “college expenses” in their profile. On free nights, he regularly trawls the web, looking for a generous sugar daddy willing to take on the burden of helping him pay off his hefty loans. Crystal chandeliers dangling above the dance floor emit a dark, ruby light and the bar is packed, often four people deep. The women, mostly black and Latina, appear to be in their mid-to-late twenties, and none look much older than 35.
On Seeking Arrangement, individuals don’t explicitly identify as gay, but merely say what they’re looking for -- be it a sugar daddy or a far smaller universe of sugar mamas. Some of the gay sugar babies seek out the companionship of older, supposedly straight men because there don’t seem to be enough gay sugar daddies to go around. His pulse further quickened when he'd stop at an ATM to deposit a huge wad of cash, stunned as his previously overdrawn bank account suddenly showed thousands of dollars at his immediate disposal. He now uses what’s left of the money to pay for basic living expenses like rent and utilities, while he continues to search for a job.
And unlike the young women engaged in similar behavior who reported feeling great shame and remorse, the men generally seemed less traumatized by their decision. Generally speaking, Grov finds the gay culture more accepting of one-night stands and casual relationships.
Many of the young men purposely kept apartments in Midtown Manhattan in order to meet up with businessmen before, during and after work, which freed them to go to school during the evenings.
With all the hopes of him being a legitimate Sugar Daddy I realized he was just looking for a one nightstand.
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People on the site ranged from 30 to 55 with net incomes from $250,000 to $5 million a year. It’s also natural for younger men and women to seek out more experienced, sophisticated, wealthy and generous partners,” the site says. Nineteen million currently enrolled college students now face an average cost of $15,876 for one year of in-state tuition at a public university or $40,633 for one year at a private institution. Biderman says that 4.2 percent of this site's young male users, or 618 men, identify themselves as students. In fact, they often felt emboldened by the money they were able to earn, rather than shamed by the stigma. In the case of being a sugar baby, I never quite have come to terms with it,” she told the paper. He immediately deposited the money into a separate savings account he created for school expenses.



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